Everything Has Changed
by thepuppiesinpink
Summary: A lot has been done with the Iran storyline from Elizabeth's perspective. This is going to be entirely from Henry's. Again, things in italics are thoughts not spoken aloud.


_Where the hell is she? What is the newest international crisis?_

Henry's thoughts weren't unfamiliar. Bess had been at work for hours. He was getting used to the insane hours, but even so, they weren't any easier to live with.

Tonight wasn't any more important than any other night – not really. But Henry needed to talk. His daughter was about to turn sixteen. Of course, Stevie was already twenty, but sixteen was a huge milestone. Ali would get her driver's license soon. It was really a very small amount of responsibility, but it was symbolic. Eventually, she would be a woman. She would move away. She would start dating seriously. She would be vulnerable, and Henry wouldn't be able to protect her.

Of course, this growing up wasn't an overnight process. This night was no more meaningful than any other, but it weighed on Henry particularly heavily. Maybe it was because this was the first major milestone for the kids since Elizabeth took the job. He just needed to talk to her. He would be fine as long as he could express that he felt like he was losing control of his family. Not that he was a misogynistic tyrant, but Stevie was half moved out already, Noodle was turning sixteen, and Jason was already dating. Even the steady and stable relationship he had with Elizabeth was changing because of the demands placed on her as Secretary of State.

This was a normal give and take in a relationship. They tried to give as much as they could to their independent endeavors, and then they would need to ground themselves in each other – in their relationship. Henry needed to reconnect. He needed to have Bess tell him that he wasn't irrelevant and outdated, that he still mattered. He needed to know that she still needed him, that she wanted him, that she had time for him. He just needed to know that the fast-paced world of DC politics hadn't outpaced him. His wife could keep up; she was an analyst. Henry, on the other hand, preferred to spend his time with ancient prophetic texts.

Henry tried to sleep. Things were always better in the morning. But he couldn't. Eventually, he gave up and set to work taking notes on a new source book. After about an hour of trying to focus with mediocre success, he finally heard her coming up the stairs. She still had her heels on. Normally, she would have ditched those at the bottom of the stairs and carried them up, or even left them on the floor by the closet.

Elizabeth in heels meant Elizabeth working. She had to tell him something. His suspicions were confirmed when she sighed heavily upon entering the room.

"Good. I'm glad I don't have to wake you up."

It was obviously important enough that she would have woken him up. He didn't mind being woken up. In fact, he occasionally encouraged her to wake him up, especially when they didn't get much alone time. Sometimes four in the morning was the only time they could squeeze some reconnecting in.

But that was not the case tonight. She still had her shoes and work clothes on.

"I don't like the sound of that."

"I've been at the White House." 

"Yeah, for quite a while." _Like I haven't noticed._

"I had to convince the President that the only way out of this little pickle in Iran is to go there."

"Please tell me you that mean for him to go there."

 _This can't be happening._ Everything was coming all at once. Could this have possibly happened on a worse night? _I need you one night, and you hit me with Iran? Really? You didn't even ask how I was. You just want my blessing on some hair-brained scheme designed to get you killed. All I wanted was you – all I needed was you – and now you're gonna go get yourself killed in a desert somewhere._

"Henry." Elizabeth was trying to calm him down.

"No. I have always got your back, but going to Iran when there is a coup in the works? No. I'm playing the husband card." He got up in frustration. _Can't you see how big of a deal this is? Why are you trying to play this so casually? Why would you risk what we have? Didn't we promise each other we wouldn't do these kinds of dangerous things anymore? We have kids, now. It's not the same._

"Babe, listen to me. If this coup moves forward and takes out the current government, Iran will become a failed state."

 _Like I don't know that, Liz? Why do you always think you have to do everything? Why am I the one who has to deal with it? You run around half the world, and leave me to pick up the pieces._ Henry drew a short breath. He knew he was only feeling this way because he was already having a rough day. He fully supported Elizabeth's job, but sometimes it was more difficult than others.

"Stop. I know you're gonna say this is what you signed up for – that there are millions of lives at stake…"

"What part of this do you disagree with?"

"Okay. There are God knows how many radicals who would love to kill you!" Henry couldn't tell if she had completely thought this through. Surely she wouldn't be willing to risk this. At the same time, he hated using fear as a persuader.

"That's why it's a secret mission. They won't even know I'm there. Okay, look. The whole point of my going is precisely because of the risk. How else are we going to send the message that we really have nothing to do with this coup?"

Elizabeth was trying to placate him. She was trying to calm him down, and at the same time demonstrate how important this was. Henry was having none of it.

"So now you admit it's risky?"

"And sanctioned by the President. Look, you can take it up with him if you want to."

The President was the exact person Henry wanted to take it out on. He had insisted that Bess take this job. This was his fault. It was his fault that she wasn't around when Henry needed her, and it was his fault that she was going to get killed halfway across the world.

"Well maybe I will." Henry stood still, completely serious. Only then did Bess seem to realize that this was hitting him hard.

"Henry. Come on. I'm gonna be okay. I love you. I will be fine."

She tried to comfort him, to soothe him. But she couldn't. He couldn't be soothed. He needed her. He needed to tell her about his insecurities about Allison. He needed help working through his latest chapter. He needed HER. Her convincing him that she would be fine while she was thousands of miles away was not what he needed. She could read his need for comfort, but not the reason. He just stood there in her arms, tense and unyielding. He wanted to melt in her embrace, like he had thousands of times. Bess was trying to make it easy for him with her soft touches and caresses. Henry's body wouldn't cooperate, though. He couldn't relax, and he couldn't hold on to her the way he wanted. If he let her know how much he needed her, he wouldn't be able to put the emotions back. Henry refused to manipulate her, and make her feel like she was abandoning him. If this was what she wanted to do, he would deal with it. That didn't mean he would like it, and it didn't mean he would stop trying to convince her to stay, but he wouldn't play dirty.

"But just in case I'm not."

"Are you really gonna go there?" _Please Lizzie, I know you're trying to make this light, but I really can't do this tonight. You're just trying to help ease the tension, but this is the last thing I'm up for._

"I think you should wait a year…"

"And there you go."

"…to remarry."

"Yes. I got that. I am not having this conversation."

"You'll be a hot commodity."

 _Could we just stop this whole thing? This is ridiculous. I don't want to replace you. Replacing you isn't even possible. You know you're it for me._

"I'm just saying for the sake of the kids, I think a year is a respectful amount of time to wait."

"Fine. A year. Are we done?" _Please just let us be done._

"Well then there's the question of to whom…" Bess was still trying to lighten his mood with teasing.

"Seriously? You have a list?" _Have I not made it clear to you that I would not remarry if anything happened to you?_

"More like parameters. I think we're talking north of forty here, with thirty-five as the floor for someone really spectacular."

The thought of himself running around with a woman not too much older than Stevie made Henry finally break his resolve. Maybe Elizabeth really did understand after all. This whole conversation was a game, and he had been so upset he hadn't even noticed.

"Okay. I'm not Hugh Hefner. Forty is just fine."

"Good. …And while I _don't_ have a list of _approved_ women…"

"Oh, my God, you have _rejects?_ "

"I do. Renee Brown."

"Okay. What is _wrong_ with Renee Brown? Okay. Okay. You're saving the world. No Renee Brown. Is there anyone else off limits?"

"Rena DeLuca, Denise Chang, Vera Petravic, Erin Blackshaw, Odette Norwood, do I _need_ to make my case there?"

This was just a list of all the attractive women Bess had worked with. She always thought they wanted a piece of Henry. It was the only time she ever showed a hint of jealousy. Henry thought it was cute. Her little hints of protectiveness just showed him how much she valued him.

"I won't even accept their lasagnas." _Don't worry, babe. I'm not going to run off with some floozy just because you have a demanding job._ Even while she was comforting him, she always had this little hint of insecurity that needed reassuring.

"Good. Make sure the kids don't like new Mrs. McCord better than they like me."

"Well, I'm marrying her, and I already don't like her, so… Is that it?" _Can we finally be done with this conversation?_

"Well, what else do you think we need to cover?"

Her little smile wasn't lost on him. He could tell she needed reassuring just as much as he did. Even if he couldn't tell her now what he had wanted to earlier, he could tell her physically. Henry pulled her down and gently got on top of her, asserting his possessive streak. _You're mine, babe. I don't care if you're in Virginia or Iran; you're all mine._

"This is our last night together."

 _If this is our last night together, I'm going to show you just how much I need you here. I won't guilt trip you about going, but I'll sure as hell remind you what you'll be missing while you're gone._

"Computer passwords?"

Henry wanted to prove himself to Bess. He wanted to show her what he could do to her. On the chance she didn't come back, he wanted her to know how much he loved her. He wanted her to have a memory of him to think of in case she saw any handsome soldiers in Iran. And if she decided she liked these clandestine trips to exciting places, he wanted her to know that she would miss a lot – that he would miss a lot. He wanted this night to be just as exciting as any foreign trip.

"Wow, this is so hot."


End file.
